The worst that can be said of a person is that they “did not pay attention.”
I’m not sure how I came across the above quote, but it has stayed with me for years.
I often quote Meredith in my communication training seminars since so much of “mis-communication” is about “mis-perception,” about not paying attention.
So the question for this post is simply this:
Do you and your partner pay attention to each other?
Especially now as you’re planning your wedding?
Like many of the questions I pose on this blog and in my books, this one seems embarrassingly simple because, of course, you pay attention, isn’t that what it means to love someone?!
I’m going to maintain, though, that it’s easy to stop paying attention without even being aware, not because you’ve stopped loving your partner, but rather, because you’re so busy.
And because you love each other and because you’re busy, it’s easy to think, “we’ll he knows I love him,” or “she knows that I support her.”
The thing is, “knowing” isn’t enough.
We need to be reassured, especially in times of stress.
So, how do you let your partner know that you’re paying attention?
What does your partner need to do in order for you to be reassured that he or she is paying attention?
Texting conveys info that is brief and to the point; it doesn’t convey feelings. It’s not a guaranteed reassurance that you’re paying attention.
On the other hand, simply looking at your partner and not being distracted with multi-tasking is a great act of reassurance!
The most reassuring of reassurances are conveyed in mindful little ways.
If you want more tips on how to communicate in smart, healthy ways with your partner – during wedding planning and beyond – check out my book,
How to Plan Your Wedding AND Stay Sane!
Treat you and your partner to a communications coaching session with me.
Click HERE for details!